rummaging.holding.deleting.

walking down the crowded alley,
she hears none of it.
she ignores the noise.
listens to the murmering of the moss growing to her left instead.
the faster she walks,the closer it gets.
the faces blur and the shops end.
its just her and the moss.



that's when she begins to realize.
she is alone.and she can't stop.not yet.



there is no other way out.
out of the moss.

a moment of stark truth.
a moment denied.
and thus she spoke.
and thus she dies.
engraved in the moss.


hidden in her lies.










^read between the lines.
you'll know what i mean.


*******


i bunked school today apparantly to finish the chemistry project but oh well,i haven't even saved the info yet.
so i guess blogging right now would be a good idea.

finally i seem to have moved on.
my life is still stagnant.sifting.but that's okay.
i figured the easiest way to get over someone was to press delete.
i deleted 433 messages.
some pictures.
his number.
i have stopped messaging.
not that it ever mattered.
soon enough i shall forget him.
even the good things.
which by the way,is better that way.
and maybe one day,i'll be strong enough to bump into him somewhere and not regret the past.
or whatever is left of it.

maybe one day,when i'm 40 and old and bored,i'll try and put together his face in my mind.
and be strong enough to smile about it.

maybe one fine day ramya will call up and ask me what he's up to and i won't flinch.
i'll just say something like "oh him? uh i don't know.i'm hardly in touch anymore."

maybe one day,i'll save his number on my cellphone again.
send a message.

and hopefully i won't get sad when he doesn't reply back.

that day.
whenever it may come,i shall know,i have grown up.
and i won't look back ever again.

***






^ thats dida.
i clicked it while she was visiting during the puja's.
she was rummaging through her purse for combiflam and it reminded me of this post.